you are beautiful mama
Some mums bounce back, Some dont and some take a little time. There is nothing wrong with any these, we are all different and that is what makes us unique.
When Grace was 3 weeks old I joined Slimming World and spent the next 6 months trying hard to get back to my pre baby weight. I would not leave the house without a full face of make up and my hair styled for fear of someone commenting on how tired I look, Does not wearing make up mean we are tired or sleep deprived? Does anyone have the right to comment on how we look unless its a compliment? Hell No! For me everyday was a battle to leave the house and socialise, I found after having Grace I lost all my confidence, I only wanted to be around family and it took until Grace was 3/4 months old for me to sort myself out, I threw myself into the deep end and joined a baby sensory class without knowing anyone. I was so nervous I almost got back in the car and drove home but I didn't. I did it! and I have not looked back, We went on to join lots of lovely classes including baby swimming lessons (which I highly recommend ignore people who say its a waste of money, those people have not tried it or stuck it out) and I met so many lovely mummy's on my journey, some of which I would say are my best friends even now and I thank them for getting me out, for making me feel welcome and one of the mum squad. Our babies are now the best of friends and have grown up together, We all lead busy lives now we are back to work and juggling toddlers and new babies but still make time to catch up, If this relates to you please do not feel alone, Motherhood can be awfully lonely sometimes but reach out, join a group or playgroup even if its out of your local area so you dont have to see people you may know.
If I could give myself any advice it would be not to give a toss what anyone thinks, dont put so much pressure on yourself to bounce back, I had an emergency C section, I gained 2 stone during my pregnancy because I craved cake, I would bake a cake a day and eat half the thing in one sitting. It was gross but when else can we do that and get away with it. I also dont bake and hate baking I am still amazed at how great some of those cakes turned out.
I no longer have time to get my hair done or my nails, I dont have a small baby who will happily sleep or gurgle in her pram whilst I indulge in a new cut or colour. These days I walk around with my hair tied in a pretty crappy mum bun and barely there make up, I have roots for days and since having Grace my usually straggly hair does not stop growing. Taking a toddler into a hair salon is not an option...Can you imagine? I can almost feel you all shudder at the thought.
So I looked in the mirror today, 7lb heavier from the Christmas binge and my hair scraped back and I thought to myself, This is me. The real me. I wore a denim skirt, Scruffy mum bun and barely there make up and I left the house on a high. I didn't look down when anyone spoke to me, instead I felt so confident, I looked at Grace dressed so sweetly and behaving so nicely and beamed with pride because there are more important things in life than my appearance. That little lady is loved, Clean and cared for and that is all that matters. I do wish I had time to go and get my hair and nails done but that could mean missing out on precious time with Grace and she is growing up so fast I am not ready for that. When she is older I will have all the time in the world for pampering myself but not now, Now I want to live in the moment and enjoy the craziness of raising a toddler.
Mums and Mums to be please do not stress about the same things I did, Its hard learning to love yourself again after your body has been through the stress of carrying a baby for 9 months and birthing a watermelon from your flower or having your stomach muscles cut leaving you with a 'pouch' I often compare myself to a kangaroo and my other half finds it hysterical whilst still telling me I am beautiful. But you are all Beautiful no matter what! Sod the stretch marks, they will fade I promise.
Stay Beautiful Ladies and enjoy your perfect babies.